[KLUG Members] loyalty, maturity and responsibility

[zdennis]

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Eric Beversluis wrote:
> Consider some guys who have been members of a group for half a dozen or
> so years--a group they consider very important and to which they've
> devoted much energy. Now they find that the currently elected leadership
> of the group is doing things that are not to their liking. What's the
> mature and nonselfish thing to do? Surely not just to pick up their
> marbles and go play some place else. Such behavior not only indicates a
> selfish interest in themselves and their own satisfaction but also the
> lack of enough maturity to stick with the group and try to move it in a
> more satisfactory direction. And, furthermore, if the group has general
> social value--as, for example, a group that is a 501(3)c public
> charity--then maybe there are also nonselfish reasons for sticking with
> the group, despite temporary dissatisfactions, rather than sulking off
> to start another group.
> 

- From dealing with people I would recommend contacting the people you are
having issues with privately, and bring up the issues you have with
them. If the matter can be resolved or agreed to be worked on behind
closed doors, then that appears to be the best route.

If they disagree with your arguments and concerns, I would suggest
contacting other leading members of the group whom you don't have issues
with, and ask them to mediate.

Most of the time issues are simply miscommunication or misunderstanding,
and most of the time people are reasonable and resolution or
clarification is easy to accomplish. Sometimes this isn't the case, and
other people need to get involved.

Be sure to have exactly what is bothering you and why it bothers you
ready for conversation, as it's hard to be the person who someone has a
problem with, yet you don't know why and they won't tell you.

I would also recommend bringing this up to a close friend or colleague
outside the group or outside the immediate group of people you're having
issues with. Sometimes you find it's you who's wearing those colored
glasses, and then again, sometimes you just strengthen the way you
already felt.

I wish the best of resolve to whatever it is that is itching away at you.

Zach

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